I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
