Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Did I show you my penis last night?
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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