they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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