butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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