Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
this will be a night to untag.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
