I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
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