is wine microwaveable?
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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