so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
