How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Randomize