Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
