No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Of course I have a pirate flag
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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