the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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