If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
