pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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