Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize
