hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
