Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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