I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
