plz talk dirty to me
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
porn star boner night. come get it.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
