I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Best friends brother. Beat that.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize