He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Randomize
