And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
