he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
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