I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize