He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
