Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
