I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
