WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
