I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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