I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
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