K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
