i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
