He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
drinking out of a sandbucket again
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
