thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
