Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
