so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
my shit smells like andre
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
