I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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