I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Randomize
