is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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