I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
