We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
