you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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