Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
