At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
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