He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
When did angry sex become our thing?
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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