six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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