Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
