If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
