Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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