Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
